Saturday, March 3, 2012

Focus on how far you have come....

source

42km seems unimaginable to run in one shot to me right now...the thought of it sends the butterflies a dancing in my tummy.  Yet, I am 12 weeks away from making a life long dream come true, running my first Marathon, during Ottawa Race Weekend.  

warning marjor braggart section coming up....wink

I found this "poster" on Pinterest today and it made me feel much more confident.  Instead of worrying about running the Marathon, I am going to build confidence in what I have done.  In February, I ran 160km, the furthest I have ever run in one month.  The last two Saturday's in a row I have run a half marathon out on my long slow runs.  Last weekend, I overcame my mental barriers on a long run on the treadmill and today I tackled the elements.  On today's, run I got my first of 5 ice cold soakers at mile 2, I had sloppy squishy shoes by the end of 22.1 km, I ran through 3 snowbanks, and a WALL of wind....and still managed a personal best time for half marathon (2hrs4min20sec). Best part, I LOVED IT!  

I went to bed last night sore, sore all over.  I woke up sore and nervous about going outside today.  I tried to convince myself that it was to yucky out, that I was too sore.  But here's the thing, the moment I started running, I felt "GREAT"....I felt like I was meant to be doing just that...running.  The first 8km of the run were amazing, the wind at my back carrying me. My thoughts were very much focused on how good it felt to run, not just physically but mentally.  The week's mash of stress, and to do's and not done's disappeared and I just ran.  At 8km the wall of wind hit and I had to lean in and push to get through it.  I swear it lasted for another 8km and even with that and my wet cold feet, I LOVED IT!  I felt strong pushing through that wind, I felt strong in mind and body.  I got a reprieve from the wind and picked up my pace, and as it often happens I went to that spiritual place.  Its this magical place, that is likely the reason I love running so much.  Someone Tweeted this week something to the effect that a long run is where you sort your soul out.  I felt like I did some soul sorting this morning.  Actually, I did a lot of taking stock and being thankful.  So very thankful for this healthy life, for the life that my family and I are living.  Thankful, for that "click" that got me off the couch and living life again.  

May 27th, is going to be one very very emotional run.  I imagine there will be a lot of soul sorting on that run as I look back at how far I have come from that young bulimic girl, to later an obese woman, and now ME.   My greatest wish is to have my kids at the finish line, to see there faces as I cross.  I am actually tearing up writing this, that's how bad I want it. 

So on I go, hopefully with dry shoes next time out, and feeling a lot more confident. 

Psssst.....when I finished my run today, the kids were outside making a snowman, and they cheered for me!  It lit me up inside :) 



6 comments:

  1. So awesome! I've only "known" you for a couple of months and am truly impressed with your dedication. Running a 'mill (as you often have in the winter) for long distances like you do and then tackling the harsh elements that Mother Nature often gives us is no small feat. Keep that emotional connection to your goal and it will drive you to the finish line, trained and ready to go. Woohoo!
    Nat (aka Zoey online) ;-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank-you so much :) you just made me smile :)

      Delete
  2. Can't wait to see a photo of you crossing the finish line. I'll be back next year, although not for the full ;) Hoping to make Army Run my first race back after baby.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank-you :) and how cool would that be for you to be back at the Army Run again this year...and after a new baby :) I'll be cheering for you :)

      Delete
  3. I'm totally imagining how those snow children cheered you on! Now I feel all warm & cuddly & stuff.

    ReplyDelete
  4. What an inspiring picture. YES!

    ReplyDelete