|find the recipe here....if you dare|
"I want the gift of letting go, of being kind to myself, of loving myself...I want to just 'be in the moment' of Christmas...enjoying the celebration and magic"
I don't want to think about all that "other" stuff...nor do I want to go into a full blown sugar coma, where I am not in the moment celebrating and interacting with my loved ones but caught in some strange cookie stuffing mania. It does seem that I have a hard time finding that "sweet spot" right in between the two. I tend to find myself either being super rigid or down right manic about filling myself.
Well last night I had a WIN, and it was better then any personal best running! It was late in the evening, and I wanted a treat, I made a small plate of my favorite Christmas treat (see pic above). It was soooo very good! Then the overwhelming urge to eat A LOT MORE kicked in, that panicked feeling of flight or fight settled in, that old habit that led to me weighing 258 pounds was banging on the door! I took many deep breaths, and I walked away! But that wasn't the win. The win was that I ate that small plate of cookies and I didn't let the guilt...that feeling of this is going to undo me...that oh you Farked Up feeling get me. I ate that treat like a woman that exercises hard, and eats very nutritiously most of the time. I ate that treat like that elusive "normal"woman would eat it...does she even exist? That was my win!
I wish you all a very Merry Christmas this year and my hope is that we will all find our way to being kind and loving with ourselves in our own way.